We walked around the block this evening per Magnus' request even though I knew he had only been walked an hour earlier by our nanny. Five houses up the street our neighbor has an in-home daycare where our little neighbors, twin four year old boys, go to daycare. We walked by and they rode their bikes up to the fence to greet Magnus and Brynn. I asked them if they were having fun and the one little dude responded "we like spring". I laughed and thought how perfectly he summarized how every Minnesotan was feeling today. I sat in my office today just itching to go outside... it was terribly unproductive. There is a really nice trail system connected to our campus so I took a quick 30 minute walk and felt much better to finish the afternoon. When I got home I learned Brynn and Allie had walked to the park on the lake where she met a little girl on the swings. Of course all I could think about was how I wanted to bring her to the park instead of sitting in that silly office. Apparently being a working mother is harder in the summertime :( so please send me all the school nurse jobs you can find! We finished our walk and did a few yard chores. I have a few tulips coming through and even though our grass was really brown during last summer's drought it's coming up nice and green albeit a little patchy. The city planted a new tree in our front yard and even though I tried my best to water it (I did have a newborn after all!) There are very few buds on it but I'll keep watching it.
This past weekend we spent up north with at our friends at their cabin. Brynn hung out with her bud Crosby. It's hard to believe that only 6 months ago Brynn was Crosby's age! Brynn enjoyed some quality outdoors time, probably ate dirt for the first time, and stayed up late (see the picture of her standing on my pillow after crawling away from a diaper change!)
We had a wonderful first Easter as a family. On Saturday baby and I took advantage of the warm weather and walked around the lake to my friend Katie's new house. We had a nice visit and Brynn enjoyed exploring the new house with her new found fast freedom. It's so comical to see the number of people walking around the lake when all winter we've essentially had the path to our self or shared it with a few other winter walker/runners. Saturday night was the offical start to the grilling season with some turkey burgers and beers. Oh how I love warm weather. When we got home we had a quick photo session to grab some Easter picks. Now that Brynn is so mobile it's getting to be more challenging but I just got a new camera remote the other day which should make things a little easier (and less of a workout!)
On Sunday morning we got baby dressed in her Sunday finest while I changed 5 times trying to find something that was A. not black (doesn't seem right to wear on Easter!) B. nursing friendly and C. warm enough :) We ventured out to church and arrived ON-TIME, quite the accomplishment really. But despite our arrival time we didn't get seats in the main church and were sent to watch the service on a large screen in "fellowship hall" aka the basement right next to the nursery. In the end it worked out as Brynn was able to crawl around in the back on the carpet while the 5 children in the last row turned around the whole time and watched her. I'm sure their parents we're really pleased that my baby was such a distraction to their kiddos but what do you do?? 40 minutes later we were on the road to my parents for Easter Bruch #1. Brynn was the center of attention and got some sweet Easter presents. She sat at the table with us and ate eggs, watermelon and grapes like a big girl. With a quick stop home to pick up the dog we were on the way to Easter #2. Brynn and Magnus burned off some more energy crawling and running respectively :) Brynn got another easter basket full of goodies and then we had another delicious ham meal.
Yesterday Brynn was 40 weeks and 3 days old. She has officially been out as long as she was in the womb. So in honor of this occasion this is the story of Brynn's birth in all it's glory. I wrote in a few weeks after she was born and truthfully it starts to get a little blurry Friday afternoon so my mom and Kyle might need to clarify some of the deatils! If you don't like medical birth terms feel free to skip it. The story is really for myself, Kyle and Brynn if she someday wants to learn all the details. I thought it would be best to store it out on the internet in case someday my computer dies.
The short version? Brynn was born a healthy and beautiful baby on June 15th. The end.
The long version:
The Wednesday before Brynn’s birth there were thunderstorms
throughout the metro and like the last big storm over Memorial Day weekend I
had contractions off and on overnight. To keep myself busy I made some strawberry
muffins that required whipping egg whites into “stiff peaks”. It was actually a
bread recipe that my mom gave me that I modified for muffins. Since I didn’t want
to wash my electric mixer I did it by hand resulting in contractions! I read in
my Ina May’s Guide to Childbirth that arm wrestling can strengthen contractions
and whipping egg whites for 20 minutes has the same effect! I had read to
ignore early signs of labor and get as much sleep as possible so that’s what I
tried to do. I was up at least
every hour trying to get comfortable and moaning through the contractions, loud
enough to wake Kyle up. When he’d asked if I was having contractions I lied
::sorry!:: so he would sleep some more. Around 630 I finally told him the truth
and just like I thought he couldn’t go back to sleep! At that point the
contractions slowed to every 20-30 minutes so I signed into my work computer
before our 920AM 40 week midwife appointment.
At the appointment everything
checked out normal, BP was great, no concerning symptoms and I had progressed
from a “1-2 cm” to 2 cm. I was still 90% effaced and the baby was at a +1
station (aka really really low). I asked for my membranes to be swept again as
they were the previous week to see if that would get things progressing. For
those who are curious this is when the provider uses sweeps a finger between
the bag of waters and cervix. There is some limited research that it can help
get labor moving but only if your body is ready. After the appointment we
stopped by Southdale to walk as it was still raining outside and if contractions
continue while you walk it’s a good sign that it’s “real” labor. I got a decaf
iced coffee and we did a few laps. At home I signed back into work while
sitting on my birth ball until the contractions starting coming at a regular
basis around noon. I timed them on my iPhone and they were coming between 7-10
minutes. I worked until about 2PM when I could no longer focus on work between
contractions. I texted my co-worker and started to focus on my contractions.
They continued to increase in frequency and with more strength so Kyle
convinced me to call the nurse midwife line when they reached every 5 minutes.
The nurse said she’d relay the message and the midwife on call would call me
back. Two hours later the contractions were coming between 3 and 4 minutes so I
called back in. I was able to manage them with ease using my exercise ball to
lean on in our bed.
The nurse said to head into the hospital
and she would call ahead for me. Kyle and I packed up our things and headed in!
I couldn’t believe the next time we’d be home would be with a baby! On the way
to the hospital my contractions spaced out and I became nervous that they would
send me home. After parking in the ramp I actually asked Kyle to drive home
because I was convinced they’d send me home and they were not painful enough! I
wanted to go home and go for a walk to see if they would pick up. Luckily Kyle
convinced me to go in as shortly after we arrived the maternity floor closed to
new admissions and we would have had to find a new hospital had we showed up an
hour later. I can only imagine the stress that would have put on me! Triage was
full (probably because of the storm the night before!) so they sent me to a
room for evaluation, the nurse checked me and I was 3cm dilated. They sent me
to walk the halls for an hour, so Kyle and I walked while I stopped about
once/lap to use the handrail during my contractions. There was another couple
walking the halls with us. While I stop approximately once per lap to breath
through the contraction the other mom sped past me in some sort of power walk. I
remember looking at her thinking “how can you walk that fast??”. Needless to
say they got sent home.
After an hour I was checked again and was now 4cm so I
got to stay! The next couple of hours involved answering questions between
contractions and getting settled into a routine. The nurse brought me a birth
ball which I used in a variety of positions including the bed. We put on my positive birth affirmations
track (from my Hypnobabies course) and I listened to the 60 minutes of
affirmation on repeat. The contractions continued to come on a regular basis
and increased in their intensity. The most painful part turned out to be
something I didn’t expect which was contraction in my upper thighs. Afterwards I searched for this thigh contraction that I hadn't come across and I guess it can happen, luckily it said this is not a guarantee to happen next time as each labor can be different. The contraction
would move in a wave ending on my thighs which made it hard to move during the
contraction. Kyle and my mom did a great job coaching me through the
contractions and massaging my upper thighs. At times they each massage one
thigh as I worked through the contraction. I labored through the night using
the ball and tub. I wish they had large tubs that you could immerse your whole
body in versus just the standard size and for my next birth I’ll be sure to
seek out a place that offers this.My cervix slowly progressed as well reaching 6 cm around 3AM (I think).
At this point I was really tired having not slept that well
the night before and would fall asleep between my contractions but I felt so
close to 7cm which usually means transition and in my mind I knew once I
reached transition that I could do it! I continue to move around through the
contractions but nothing I did seemed to make a difference. I tried kneeling,
sitting backwards on the toilet (sounds odd but a lot of labor techniques
recommend it!), the birthball and simply laying down as I became more
exhausted. I had Kyle and my mom remind me to drink and eat but I had no real
appetite. Around 430/5 my midwife came in again and offered to check my
progress and to my dismay I was still at a 6. I asked what we could do and she
offered to break my water. I read a lot of natural birth stories to help
prepare myself for labor and a common theme was that once your water was broken
(particularily if it’s artificially broken) labor become way more intense. At
this point I was exhausted and could fathom having to deal with contractions
that were more intense. I talked it over with Kyle and he agreed it was time
for an epidural. I guess I’m still disappointed that an epidural was necessary
for me to deliver Brynn but at the same time having a healthy baby was goals. Later Kyle told me how relieved
he was I decided to get it!
After getting an IV placed and receiving my
mandatory bag of fluids Dr. Dondlinger the anesthesiologist was called to place
the epi. He was really good (and a really polite doctor I might add!) and it
was placed quickly and worked well. I slept for a few hours and woke up to the
next change of shift and new midwife who was on-call. Around 9 Vida, the new midwife came in
and offered to check my cervix. At this point I thought for sure I would have
made progress. All the birth stories I read that involved epidurals resulted in the fact that the mom
would finally rest and her cervix would dilate. As it turns out I was not in
this group and I had no dilated at all. AT ALL. I was disappointed to saw the
least but hoped. As I learned later the reason I struggled to dilate beyond a 6
had nothing to do with my innabilty to relax but Brynn’s position. Vida then
brought in an exercise ball shaped like a peanut. Apparently they had just
received them the week before and they were supposed to help you dilate and
they worked best with women who had epidurals. I spent the rest of the day
being turned side to side with the peanut between my legs eating popsicles and
watch Modern Family on the iPad. Slowly I dilated to a 9 but then paused
sometime around 6PM. My uterus was getting tired and my contractions were not
as strong so they started a low dose pitocin (another thing I had hoped to
avoid because it can lead to extra strong contractions which sometimes the baby
doesn’t tolerate and you end up with an emergency c-section). At this point my
epidural was wearing off and I was feeling contractions in strips down my belly
and my thighs. I would try to roll to the side I was feeling the pain to help
move the medication but it was no longer helping and the nurse let me know that
I had essentially used up all my epidural time. The benefit was I could now move
myself around the bed and after essentially being at the mercy of the nurses
the last 12 hours it felt nice to help at least move myself in bed.
Around 7:45ish (my memory is very
blurry at this point!) Vida came back in for another progress check but I was
still at a 9. She let me know she felt a lot of “caput” which is essentially
the babies head was getting a bruise due to mal-position. The reason I hadn’t
been dilating was that Brynn’s head wasn’t putting pressure on my cervix like
it was suppose to. She made a few adjustments and decided to let me push to see
if we could move the last part of the cervix out of the way. This has some
risks as if you push too soon the cervix can swell which will require a
c-section. But I was lucky and she was able to push the cervix away (with some
force I might add!).She looked at
the nurse and said it’s time to push!
I. Was. So. Excited.
For the first time
in a long time that day I smiled (mostly there had been tears as I feared for a
c-section and felt guilty for getting the epidural).I gave a few more practice pushes and Vida gave the green
light to remove my catheter (too much information? haha..well childbirth is not very glamerous)! This was another
positive sign as they would only take it out if I was making progress with my pushes. Then the real pushing began. I'd push with each contraction initially not
noticing much change but Vida was pleased with my progres. I pushed on my side with my mom and Kyle’s support. We turned on music on my phone and the
only CD I had downloaded on my iTunes was Mishka, which for those who don’t
know is a reggae artist. I’m not sure which song Brynn was born to but it was
one of his! It created quite the relaxing..and somewhat tropical vibe to the birthing suite! Soon Brynn moved down into the birth canal and there was immense
pressure/pain. Now I would never compare this part of my labor to a natural
labor but I’m fairly certain the epidural was doing little to nothing at this
point. Not only could I move my self around...I could feel everything. I started to question whether I could do this and asked for more
epidural medication (which I was refused of course as it was too late in the
game). They reminded me to use my hypnobabies techniques and my breathing
techniques in between pushes. It literally felt like she was going to fall out
there was such intense pressure.
Eventually you could see a tiny
part of her head and they brought in a mirror. I thought the mirror would be
more motivating that it really was. I should note one
of the benefits of using midwives (or at least the group I used) is that they
are there with you the entire time you push (and check in frequently during labor) unless another mom is closer to
delivery. It’s nice to have their constant support. As I pushed Brynn’s head
rotated in the birth canal putting her into a better position to deliver. Vida
was apparently impressed at this rotation as I remember her saying that it was
neat to see her rotate as I pushed. Two and half hours later Brynn was born. I
didn’t see her leave me as my eyes were closed as I pushed but when I opened
them they laid her “tiny” screaming body on me.
I was so glad it was over. 34 hours later and it was over.
The pain and pressure were gone and almost instantly (I am
not joking...the pain was gone in an instant) I was full of this euphoria
thanks to a flood of hormones. Brynn rested on my chest as the nurses cleaned her up and Kyle cut the cord. She spent
the next hour with me nursing before they weighed her and did her eye ointment.
Then the grandparents came in to see her for the first time. We eventually
moved to another room and laid down to rest around 3 AM.
A few thoughts for the next time (which shall not take place for a long time):
Have birth partners come in shifts so they get some sleep (But thanks to my mom
and Kyle for staying up with me all night long!)
Stay home as long as possible
Drink more fluids
After I got my bag of fluid (1000ccs) to get my epidural I
felt better so I might try to get fluids next time if I feel exhausted.
Labor in a tub or at least have a large one available.
Have someone take pictures during and after labor. After 34
hours of labor I think we were lucky to grab the camera and get some video
(albeit a little blurry). This thing is there is really no shame when it comes
to childbirth and even though you really don’t look your best (hello puffy face
and double chin!) you’ll want the pictures eventually.
Here is a video from her first day of life. As noted above please ignore the puffy double chin and sweat I'm sporting and focus on what is Brynn minutes old.
As it turns out babies are fairly simple. The baby industry is HUGE and full of very expensive toys that require lots of batteries. But at the end of the day Brynn seems to prefer the toys that don't need batteries or toys that are not baby toys at all. Hello TV remote and dog toys. But here's a flashback of the classic box.
After Brynn was born Kyle's mom pulled some old photos out of Kyle as a little baby and the similarities to Brynn were impressive. I think so far we've determined Brynn has my ears, cheeks, and possibly big toes :) everything else is her daddy's.
As Brynn approaches her first birthday I'm starting to see less baby-ness in her features. Her cheeks not quite as chubby, her cowlick in her hair covered by her ever growing locks, and her wrist rolls starting to fade. I thought I'd capture some of her little baby parts before they disappear into toddlerhood. To be fair Brynn has never really been a tiny baby tipping the scales at 9lbs at birth but she's the littlest baby I've ever had :)
We spent a nice long weekend with Grandma and Grandpa Palmer up on the north shore. Here's the recap:
The good:
Grandpa and Kyle went skiing and had great snow on Friday.
Mom took a long jacuzzi bath and got a hot stone massage while Grandma watched Brynn.
Brynn went sledding for the first time. And by sledding I mean being slowly pulled on level surfaces covered in snow. Maybe you'll get a hill next year sweet baby.. maybe.
Mom and dad ate dinner... alone.
The bad:
Gophers lost to Wisconsin by one point. :(
The Ugly:
Driving up to Lutsen during Brynn's bed time. Girlfriend likes her milk, a cuddle and a bed and she made this known. Note to self: don't do that again.
When we arrived home I started my first of probably 3 loads of laundry...only to come down to a soaking wet rug and a broken machine. Needless to say the laundry is piling up and Brynn is on her last pair of pjs. Luckily dad installed the new washer yesterday.
Brynn in her "wild" cloth diaper taken 3 months ago!
We started using cloth on Brynn at about 3 weeks of age. Prior to then she was too small to comfortably fit as we use one-size diapers that should fit up to 35lbs. And she was too big for the extra small diapers we made. To be fair we still only use cloth during the day and switch to disposable or paper diapers as I like to call them at night or when we travel.
Brynn at 8 weeks
Oma and I sewed all of her diapers and we have about 21 diapers and 40 bamboo inserts (which I purchase through a co-op).
Using cloth (even part time) has a number of benefits.
1. Cost. Even though there is a "start-up" cost making your own significantly reduces this. After the initial cost we rarely have to put purchase paper diapers. They "say" babies will have 10-12 dirty/wet diapers a day in the beginning and 6-8 as they get older but the truth is you go through a lot more diapers than just 6-8. There are many times I use at least 2 diapers per change (I think the record is 4!) because she'll pee as she's being changed or poop immediately after.. And since no parent is going to knowingly let their baby have a dirty diaper.. you change them again and the cycle continues. Thus 6-8 diapers turns into 10+ very quickly.
2. Rashes. Brynn has only had three diaper rashes and both came after sleeping in dirty paper diapers. Both rashes cleared up in about a day with Earth Momma Angel Baby diaper cream and only using cloth. The cream is expensive but worth it.
3. Cuteness. Cloth diapers are so much cuter than paper!
4. Environmental cost. Paper diapers don't breakdown in the landfill for a guesstimated 250 years. I always feel guilty bringing my bag of dirty diapers to the garbage can! Even though cloth diapers use energy to clean the cost is only about $1.40 (taken from a cloth diaper website) per load and in the summer I used the sun to dry the diapers so the cost is only about $0.45.
5. Potty Training. Kids who use cloth diapers potty train quicker because they are used to the feeling is being wet vs the dry feeling paper diapers give them.
The biggest deterrent for people to use cloth is having to clean them. You can get a service to clean your diaper but then you have to use a type of diaper called covers and pre-folds which we don't use.
I find cleaning diaper to not be a big deal at all! All I have to do is throw them in the wash (we have an commercial grade top loader which came with the duplex which is actually better than front loaders to wash dipes) with a cold cycle then a hot cycle with County Save soap then hang them to dry. The diapers dry in a few hours and the inserts take about 24 hours which is fine because I have double the amount I need. When I was using my clothes line outside everything dried in hours and the sun bleached all the stains away. Easy. It can't take more than 5 minutes of my time.
If anyone ever has any questions about cloth diapers (or wants me to make them a few!) ask away.
Dear Brynn you are 7 months old today! Your personality continues to blossom and you are just overall a joy to be around. This was a big month as you said your first word "dada" and are up to 4 teeth. You handle teething really well and usually just a bit fussier than normal. We actually didn't know your first top tooth popped through until we heard you grind you teeth together, luckily that is not a habit you continued. You do like to put your bottom and top teeth together and blow air through them which is really cute.
You are 17.5 lbs (64th percentile) and 27.75 inches (93rd percentile). Long and lean. It's common for nursing babies to lean out after 6 months and your doctor predicts you'll be in the 50% or a little below at your 9 month check up so we'll see if she's right!
Knock on wood but you have yet to get sick! We think we can credit you staying at home with your nanny to that!
You are really doing well with the baby led weaning. You love to eat and if you see us eating you look at us like "where's mine?". In addition to the precious list of foods you've added oatmeal (just regular Quaker) and applesauce. We're going to do some more sweet potatoes and maybe some squash this week.
You love to stand and can actually stand unassisted while holding on to your play table (with us right behind you of course). Except for the few times you don't care to roll over. You like to lunge for things which your pediatrician said is a good precursor to crawling.
You love love love Magnus our dog. You watch him and grab him whenever he gets to close. When we ask "Where's Magnus?" you look around the room to find him. He also likes you and continues to try to get an elusive lick of your face..you must taste good :) We're lucky that he is so gentle around you.
It's been so cold recently we've pretty much just stayed inside but mom looks forward to some long stroller walks this spring. You rode sitting up in the cart for the first time at Trader Joe's. You loved looking around from your new perch!
After a few weeks of a solitary "da" Brynn strung two together to the delight of her "dada" :) It's quite cute as she likes to get her whole body involved and will bob her head up and down while babbling away. Have I mentioned how much I love this age? So. Fun. She also learned to clap and as soon as I get it on video (and learn how to post videos) I'll share.
Brynn- You are such a joy. If I could pause time this is the month I'd pick. You have such a little personality yet remain mostly immobile ;) It's easy to get you to smile and when you laugh it melts our heart. You had a very busy month with your first Thanksgiving and plane ride to Florida. Six months really caught me off guard..time is just flying by. We won't have stats on your for a few more weeks as your doctor was pretty booked up this month. You learn things so quickly now, one day you're barely sitting up and now you're a pro. You got your first tooth (bottom right) over our trip to Florida, you were a little more fussy than usually and had some pretty impressive diapers but overall it wasn't too bad. You are a very strong little girl and like to lunge back and forth which I assume will lead to crawling. We have big plans to start some solids and celebrate your first Christmas as well as your second trip to Florida for New Year's.
Brynn you are growing into such a fun little girl! You are very curious to your surrounding and like to be busy! I imagine this is only a taste of what is to come in terms of "busyness"! :) Everything goes into the mouth and you are beyond curious when we eat. You like to try and grab whatever is on the plate and put in your mouth but you have to wait one more short month! You continue to yell/sing at quite a loud pitch which we still find endearing. The best noise by far is your baby belly laugh. Your dad and I work very hard to make you laugh because there is no better sound to our ears! There is nothing like a happy baby to make you smile and remember what really matters in life. You continue to be very strong and enjoy time in your bouncer. Everyone likes to tell us that you'll walk early because you like to stand so much. You have really started to notice Magnus and if he gets too close you like to take a handful of fur or try to put his leg in your mouth (along with everything else!).
We won't see the doctor until your 6 month appointment but you are obviously growing. You are thriving at home while mom goes to work and even though she misses you so much we've found a good balance of work/family life.
This next month will bring your first plane ride (wish us luck!) and your first Thanksgiving.
A few weeks ago Brynn found her feet. Before that she'd grab them every once in a while but now she is full steam ahead. She especially likes to have both feet in her hands during diaper changes which makes them a little challenging! Babies in general are really good and removing socks. Tiny babies can houdini themselves out of most pairs and Brynn was no exception. You'd commonly hear her little feet moving back and forth ::swish swish:: while she rode in her car seat and when you go to the backseat to get her out the socks were off!
